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Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage.
He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married,
and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked.
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An elderly woman died last month.
Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers.
In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service,
she wrote,
"They wouldn't take me out while I was alive,
I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead.
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A police recruit was asked during the exam,
"What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?"
He said,
"Call for backup."
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A Sunday school teacher asked the children
just before she dismissed them to go to church,
"And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"
Annie replied,
"Because people are sleeping."
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A Sunday School teacher asked her class
why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem.
A small child replied: "They couldn't get a baby-sitter."
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A Sunday school teacher was discussing
the Ten Commandments
with her five and six year olds. After explaining the
commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother,"
she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us
how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy answered,
"Thou shall not kill."
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At Sunday School they were teaching
how God created everything,
including human beings.
Little Johnny seemed especially intent
when they told him how Eve was created
out of one of Adam's ribs.
Later in the week
his mother noticed him lying down
as though he were ill,
and said," Johnny what is the matter?"
Little Johnny responded,
"I have a pain in my side.
I think I'm going to have a wife."
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A very dirty little fellow
came in from playing in the yard
and asked his mother,
"Who am I? "
Ready to play the game she said,
"I don't know! Who are you?"
"WOW!"
cried the child.
"Mrs. Johnson was right!
She said I was so dirty,
my own mother wouldn't recognize me!"
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FWD From
Fred
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