Proposed New Commandments

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Thou Shalt Not Play "The Electric Slide" Or "The Chicken Song" At Wedding Receptions.

Honor Thy Foster Parents, Egg Donor, Adoptive Father, Daycare Provider, Big Brother/Sister, Probation Officer...

Thou Shalt Not Make Little Quotation Marks With Your Fingers While Speaking.

Thou Shalt Not Encourage Prop Comedians or prop preachers.

Honor Thy Stepfather, Though He Be A Jerk.

Honor thy Ex as the Mother/Father of thy children, if for no other reason.

Thou shalt not become a legalist or Pharisee.

Thou shalt not pray or speak in King James English outside of church services.

Thou shalt not get to church early just to get a seat on the back row.

Thou shalt not wad up a bunch of small bills to place in the offering plate to make it look like you're giving more than you actually are.

Thou shalt not accept a post as deacon if the only time you come to church is on Sunday Morning.

Thou shalt not allow saxophone solos during Sunday morning worship services, nor Sunday evening, nor Wednesday evening.

Thou shalt not disagree with Dr. Laura.

While some of these are thoughtful, they are being offered here in fun. They are a reminder of how the Pharisees got caught up in the law and came up with a list of more than 600 rules for people to follow in living their lives. Jesus came to remind us that being human, we can't follow all the rules and we can't meet the requirements of the law. Jesus came to provide the grace we need for forgiveness that allows us to live our lives in Christian freedom.

FWD From

Fred